Insult To MY Injuries

Multiple concussions, multiple car accidents, multiple bites or sting from poisonous creatures, multiple bone breaks in multiple ways.  Soft tissue damage, nerve damage, brain damage.  I would like to think but can’t remember anymore what other injuries I have had, I know near electrocuted a couple times, but enough.  I add one, something new almost, today.

Today I had an elevator accident. I won’t get into the time we got stuck in Portugal or Nice in the elevator and had to pry the doors and crawl out. But  after taking my son down to his mother’s car to take him to her place, I started my journey back up to my 9th floor apartment. At the third floor the carriage suddenly shuddered to a stop.

I don’t  like elevators much, but these are usually good, unlike my ex-girlfriends horrors. I hit the emergency call button and the alarm button and waited.  The carriage suddenly shuddered and fell to the first floor.  Grinding and shaking hard the whole way down.

I am already suffering from multiple layers of multiple injuries and have 7-8 known concussions already.  I am dealing with an August of this year Traumatic Brain Injury and yet more soft tissue damage, and further damage to sadly each and every part of my body.

This is another layer now, and I am terrified to find out if I had suffered another concussion from the head shaking that went on.  I am seeing my nerve testing neurologist in the morning anyways and spending 8 hours in the hospital when I need to do nerve testing anyways the next day makes no sense. I will contact my Brain Clinic at CBI in the morning.  They also handle my physiotherapy in conjunction with my brain therapy. From what I can see right now, a good place to be taken care of for my very intricate medical needs.

The waves of pain are starting to hit me now in my back, shooting up my spine.  My mid back is now finally really hurting to the point I may throw up tonight again….this is really getting to be a tough Sunday night.  But at least I have now  I hope the strength to face the night and and the loving embrace of my old lover, suffering and pain, the twins tonight.

If the lighting storm of electrical charges starts up in my head this is most definitely going to be another ring of Hell night for me.

If you are wondering why I am writing this out instead of resting or going to the hospital?  Well, I am or was fairly smart, I have learned a lot in a short amount of time about my brain and how to deal with it now, if alone I am fine.  I can quiet it if I can clear out all my concerns, my worries about bills and just urgent needs matters.  If I need to say something, get something off my mind, out of my head so I am not thinking about it. This is best done so I can rest.

So here I am getting things off my mind so I can try to deal with a night of pain and suffering free of the thoughts not wanted, free to let my mind shut off and do nothing but see the blackness. Hear the rustle of leaves, the trickle of water.  When out in my beloved creek, the smell of rotting leaves this time of year, the wet dirt smell, rich in aroma.

I love lying there with my sound cancelling muffs on, my eye shades on blocking out the light, just being a part of the earth.  I find such comfort, rest, a re-charging of my soul.

So  I would like to say thank you to the person that returned my glasses to me.  Your act of kindness gains you some respect. I am sorry to say I am rather busy to talk until after about  Dec. 28th this year.I think you can understand that fully. Once my trust is lost, it has never been regained by anybody in the past.  Why I have so few friends left to me in this world, but I have known them for an average of 30+ years, my best friend 42 years now. So right now I can’t afford to take the chance to talk directly.

Wow, I can see my words are getting really badly written now, this is not normal, I am usually a very good typer.  80 words a minute in high school on the old fashioned type. the non electrics, man I can actually remember my old friend charlie and the carriage return incident. Poor ms. Chasty, she never yelled at him to return the carriage hard again. I have never seen a carriage fly across a room before nor again.  Charlie was a troubled guy, huge and had a bit of a temper, but a decent friend to me, I did like Charlie a lot actually, we played hockey together for years.

I will have to contact my insurance company, the people trying to get me better, on top of my treatments.  They should full well know I can’t be under any stress, no pressure.  I need to take great care not to get upset.  The same people that have not paid my bills, and have the hospital sending me to the collection agency.  Yup nice stuff, thanks people, I may blog about you folks in the future.

I should leave a sample of uneditted writting so you can get and idea of how bad thighns can get for me now at time.  If i had somebody here to talk with I would be interewsted to see if i wa slurring my wors or not.  I  dont drink.

Wow, ok drifting now from what I was doing, I think it is time to shut this all down for now and decide if I should contact emergency services.  I can’t go to the hospital, bloody wait times are killers.




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