I am into court today again to find out if my assault charge is going to get dealt with properly or not. I am going to find out today if everybody that has again said they will do as they have said they will actually do it. I will find out today if people actually will follow up when they know a great wrong has been done and help fix couple people’s lives.
Personally I really don’t care if this charge sticks on my record or not. I know I am not a violent person, nor does anybody that knows me. Anybody can be in the proper circumstances though. What I really care about here is the indirect impact on my son Aidan. He is being severely hurt by this in ways many without knowing a thing except we are not moving yet.
I am broke and living off my line of credit until my family court is finished up. I have won there basically. I did not get full custody but never thought for a minute I would, should is a whole different story. But I really won, as in Animal Farm, not all pigs are equal, I am the more equal pig on all things raising Aidan. It is my parenting plan in use and that is a huge victory for me. But because of this assault charge against me my lawyer refuses to go to court and finish things up in case the other side brings up this situation. So as I can’t finalize the spousal support she owes me and back pay for the last 3 years of not giving me a penny to live and support our son. Without this money in place I can’t show the new landlord a way I can pay for the rent. No ability to pay the rent I can’t move into a place I dream about daily, my son talks about every time he is with me. It sits right on the creek I have played in for over 40 years now, seconds from the back door. My chosen spot for my recovery, the perfect spot in the city for complete escape from the speed of life.
I am looking forward to losing the stress of knowing my money is running out and there is nothing I can really do about it. Maybe take up a sign and sit on a highway off ramp and beg. I actually don’t mind the thought, maybe bring some more light to the plight of people like me, lost in the cracks of the system with nobody even trying to help. I can assure you that it is near impossible for a person like me to spend money on anything when I know they are my last dollars. I have enough for several months still but not much longer. I just hope enough for the courts to finish, 3 years now almost, yet the ex can ram through a divorce, stunning how the system gets played.
I would actually like to buy Aidan a nice toy for once. Just because, no other reason except he is the best son a father could imagine. I love him to pieces and he has done everything a 6 year old could do to be brave during these trying times of dad’s health crisis. I know he does not need a toy, first off I am his top toy of all time. We play together from sun up to sundown. Or we really used to. Now I need to take a lot more breaks, and I can’t really go outside much anymore. I don’t have the money to replace our destroyed bikes, court not done. Without the bikes I am highly limited to how far we can go. I can ride the bikes a good distance, the mechanics on my body are very different from walking. Once to where we want to hike we can hike and enjoy ourselves properly, and then ride back to the car. No more.
I would love to be able to take Aidan to a place like Ninja’s, an indoor obstacle course for adults and children, it is extremely difficult. It is very similar to the one you would see on the TV show, no water or moving parts though. For a 6 year old, a great place to place, most could not do the challenge at all. Aidan on his first day seeing the place was beating the times of children twice his age who were members and used the course daily to practice. The staff were so stunned they brought the owner out to see my son do the course. Nobody thought it possible for a child of 6 to do the whole course, and faster than kids twice his age sight unseen. If I can find a picture later I will post it, I can’t find one right now. I would like to take him to a place where he can show off his abilities and I can just watch and not have to attempt to keep up.
There are a lot of things that can happen if people do as they say, do the right thing here in this situation. I can’t possibly understand how things have gotten this far still, I had honestly hoped last week would be the end of things. But now I am almost done here, and it is 9am almost, time to shower and start doing my physio therapy and not worry about what other people will do. All I can do is deal with the aftershock of other people’s actions. I can’t control them.
Funny how a person like me a person that tries to tell the truth and go about an honest life has such trouble staying out of trouble and healthy. Ironic I think. I wonder what would have happened if I had set out so many years ago to become a master criminal. Maybe today I would be sitting on a nice beach somewhere enjoy great health and large sums of money. I doubt I would be living a worse life than I am right now, but I keep on trying, and that keeps me going, hoping one day things will get easier for my son and myself.