Desperate Times

I never would have thought of asking for help, it is not my nature.  Yet after seeing myself get burned over and over while telling the truth the whole time I felt things are just plain wrong.

I was raised to believe in the truth, if you tell the truth you will not get into trouble.  The courts know the truth, and they will not punish a person if you are telling the truth.

I have sadly learned that the lessons in life I grew up with were likely a dead cause when I was in fact learning them.  The world as I knew it is gone.  The world I have been thrust into is nothing like I knew and understood.

I actually do not know anybody that tells the truth in my life.  They all lie in one form or another.  So for me to tell the truth always and make my life so difficult when in turn I could lie as everybody else does, tell people what they want and get ahead.

This go fund me request is a start of trying a new method of finally getting ahead.  I need a new place to live, I can’t afford it, now I use my outside the box thinking.  Something I am teaching my son daily.  I will start a go fund request and try and get a little help from a lot of people.  Spread the love if you wish please.

I need to have no money worries for awhile, I need to recover.  With a chunk of money like this I could replace all the destroyed bikes and camping gear from the accident, I could purchase my own mobility device to get around with.  I could purchase the go pro video gear I need to start filming again.  I want to continue on my disability project and my son wants to do a youtube video blog about our life together and how we play, it is extremely unique.

I have no choice at this point to ever think I will get the monies I feel I am owed, millions really.  Lawsuits take forever and when against the Ontario Government double it.  They created my disability and they refuse to pay me for this.  They cut me off years ago and I have nothing to live on and the Federal Govt, has granted me the disability that the Ontario Govt refuses to accept.  Go figure.

Anyways, I am now trying other methods to get some money coming in, next spring and summer I may end up sitting by the highways exit and beg a bit.  I just need to make enough to have a life with my son, I may not deserve it, but he does.  So I will break my body further and beg come warmer weather and pick up even 20 dollars a day, that will add up nice and pay for food.  Fresh produce is not cheap at all, and Aidan loves it.

There are times in your life where you just have to get in with the poop and deal with it.  I am now in this place.  I see myself as a total failure as a father and I have created almost none of my problems.  It is astounding when I look back at my life and see so clearly where it went all wrong.  Sorry Aidan, daddy may just have been wrong, the truth does not set you free, in fact it tears your body apart without a care in the world.  At least at this point in my life I feel rather this way.  I know money is not the answer to my problems, it will not fix my health issues.  But it will allow me to get to places easier so we can enjoy ourselves a lot more.

Well, this has been a long and tough day.  I still need to cook food, and clean up, my poor head is splitting open.  I think i will stop everything now and just rest.



3 thoughts on “Desperate Times

  1. I cannot understand why the govt body is refusing your disability request. Actually I can, we here in Australia are having the same struggles. People are getting letters to say they have to prove they still require the disability pension. I am on the pension my daughter is on the pension. Our chronic illness’s will not go away. She is intellectually disabled with the same condition I have. Luckly for me and I say lucky that its only internally my body is affected. I will share your post in the hope that others do see this and you get the help you so deserve xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you so much for your offer. The govt agency that has done this to me does it a lot and hopes people die before payouts. Saves money. Oh my horror gets worse, the govt agency that is supposed to help disabled people cut me off without a word, I am taking them to human rights, no lawyers much faster and totally public, that is what i want, it made public now.


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